"I Can do all Things Through Christ Which Strengtheneth Me"

I am feeling so much better about everything eye related.  I spent a lot of time doing some thought work and trying to rewire the way I think about myself and my eyes and it totally worked!  Thoughts are so powerful!

Thanks to my sister, Julie, I had a pretty great break through.  She pointed out that I've always had really great friends.  Like those people that just would drop anything and run for you and stick up for you and are real and never back bite and are just the best people ever.  She suggested that maybe the lazy eye weeded out all the shallow people.  People who are worried about the outside appearance or things not being perfect don't stick around.  LOL I actually just love this thought!  How lucky am I??

 I realized that all the people that I care about and love don't care that my eyes aren't perfect.  If nobody else cares, why should I?  I am much more than just the way my eyes look.

Now that I've gotten my emotions under control again it's time to get back to my work on strengthening my right eye.  I reread my original post and it helped me realize how far I've come!  Patching is not that big of a deal anymore.  I can totally function while I'm patching, almost normally now.  I am seeing so much better!  I don't run into walls, I can successfully follow recipes, chopping veggies with a knife is no longer life threatening, I can read SO much better and faster and can comprehend more.  It's not perfect, but I have come so so far.

I had a follow up appointment with the vision therapist, we haven't had official therapy yet, it has all been testing and getting starting points.  I have been doing some new exercises while I wear the patch in addition to the scripture reading.  There are a ton of youtube videos that are "so boring" as Adeline says every time I turn it on.  Basically there is a black and white screen with a little red ball moving around that I have to watch.  I sit my chair right in front of TV and try to do it for 10-15 minutes each day.

At my second appointment the doctor said that my right eye was already going out less and seemed stronger.  He originally said it will take at least a year to get to my "best."  He doesn't think my eyes will ever be perfect but he thinks they can get much better.  I have big plans to prove him wrong.  I wanted to tell him my secret that God is on my side and helping me.

I'm not expecting to wake up the morning after I finish the Book of Mormon and have my eyes be perfect over night.  I know that it is possible, I know that if that is what Heavenly Father wanted for me, he could absolutely do it, but I have a hunch that I will have to keep working for it.  I have a feeling that there is more to this then having straight eyes.

In Alma 37:6 it says: 
"Now ye may suppose that this is foolishness in me; but behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise." 

I feel like the biggest miracle I've seen is Heavenly Father leading me and teaching me those small and simple things that I need to do to get my great thing.  Patching, reading, maintaining eye contact, therapy, youtube videos.  Each of these things has come one by one just when it was needed.

2 Nephi 28:30
For behold, thus saith the Lord God: I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear [or eye!!!] unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more; and from them that shall say, We have enough, from them shall be taken away even that which they have.

Gaining a testimony of these principles is the real miracle.  I'm practicing these things and really seeing the reality of how true they are.  I'm seeing how God has a plan for me and he will take care of me in the exact way that I need.

I am amazed at how often the scriptures have the exact message that I need for that day.  When I was feeling down and dark a couple weeks ago and was ready to quit, actually, I did quit for two days.  On the day that I decided to start up again I came across Helaman 10:4-5.  On the margin I had written the note to replace Nephi's name with my own.  Now, I'm no Nephi, but I read it with my name anyway,  and just felt so much peace, comfort, and love.

4 Blessed art thou, Nephi [Melissa], for those things which thou hast done; for I have beheld how thou hast with unwearyingness declared [read] the word, which I have given unto thee, unto this people. And thou hast not feared them, and hast not sought thine own life, but hast sought my will, and to keep my commandments.

5 And now, because thou hast done this with such unwearyingness, behold, I will bless thee forever; and I will make thee mighty in word [and sight??] and in deed, in faith and in works; yea, even that all things shall be done unto thee according to thy word, for thou shalt not ask that which is contrary to my will.

God is good, he loves us, he wants us to seek him out.  He will always answer us if we have our minds and hearts open to him.  And the answer will definitely not come in ways that we expect, at least not for me!

"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me" - Philippians 4:13